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WATCH VIDEO OF AGNES, JANET, AND SALLY-YOU MIGHT LEARN A THING OR TWO

Phillips: We hold a 9 a.m. chalkboard session conducted by Terry Earwood. "You can trust me," he assures the nervous ladies. "I taught my first school here in 1984. In fact, I started driving at age 12 because my parents were heavy sleepers.

"Our goal today," Terry announces, "is to slowly work up to way too much speed." Then he adds, "You know the difference between a spin and a crash? Volume."

Quiroga: Terry explains that racing is as competitive as a half off sale at Nordstrom. Sally asks, "So we're supposed to hit each other?"

Phillips: Bill Adam is firm with the ladies yet charms them. "I want you to be the laziest driver ever," he tells Sally. "If you don't have to turn the wheel, don't. Be smooth. Imagine I'm holding a martini."

Sally then turns early and abruptly into Turn One. "Oh, man," says Bill. "There went the gin and the olive."

Quiroga: Terry, pointing to Kiley taking photos of the driving action, says, "He may want you to spin out for the camera." "I'd rather not," Janet answers.

"That's okay," Terry says in a reassuring voice. "We'll do that later."

Phillips: Agnes puts two wheels into the grass on the outside of fast Turn One. Terry grabs the wheel and saves what might have been a Force Nine vehicular rotation. " Why'd you drive over there?" he asks.

"I don't know," says Agnes. "Well, can you guess?" "No."

"It's because this is the first lap I stopped telling you when to turn. I'm not telling you next lap, either." "Oh, God," Agnes moans.

Quiroga: Janet is driving in the middle of the track, steering with one hand.

"It's hard to break 60 years of bad habits," Terry says. "How old do you think I am?" she snaps. For the first time all day, Terry has nothing to say.

Phillips: Bill instructs Janet to brake a little early on the 90-degree turn at the end of the back straight. When she does, he grabs the wheel and turns in prematurely. The Mini's tail fi>l 0CT 01 2009

CARANDDRIVER*COM/MOTHERSINLAW

rotates a few degrees, and when he returns the wheel to Janet's control, she nails the turn's apex so fast and hard that she's startled.

"Trail braking," explains Bill.

"Amazing! Fantastic!" she screams, pounding the steering wheel.

Quiroga: Bill has a seemingly inexhaustible supply of analogies that Janet, the English teacher, appreciates. "Pretend there's an egg under the accelerator, a rope between the steering wheel and the throttle, and two glasses of Southern Comfort on the dash. Now, if I stick my hand out the window, I want to be able to touch each apex cone."

"You're my favorite," Janet says.

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